Doesn’t he know what his smile is doing to me? When Blair smiles, the entire room glows with warmth and light. He’s doing it now and driving me crazy. I want to kiss him so badly. I think I want to take things slow; I don’t want to attack him in the first five minutes. It would be nice if we lasted longer than that. Okay, it would be nice if I lasted longer than that.
I wonder how many men he’s been with, because I’m not that experienced myself. It’s been about 20 years since I’ve been with a man and things have changed a lot, I’m sure. Maybe I should read up on some things first before I make my move. I wouldn’t want to embarrass either of us, the first time.
I need to get up a minute and stretch my legs. I’ll walk the halls for a moment and kill some time. He’s watching me leave and the look on his face tells me that he is nervous. He doesn’t want me to leave. Well, I’ll be damned. He wants me just as bad as I want him. I’ll just get a drink and go back in. Damn it, why do I always get water all over the front of myself? I look like a dork now. This will really help my case.
Why is he smiling like that at me? Is he making fun of me, or does he just like to smile at me? I think he likes to smile at me. I wonder what he’s going to taste like the first time. I just have to have faith. He’s got to taste as wonderful as he looks. I’m hanging on to that faith and it’s going to carry me through.
Almost time to go and I’m scared to death. I love him so much. I wonder if he has faith in me. I hope so.