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Warnings: No real betrayal, just what is thought to be.

First Betrayal
By Patt



Conner walked up to Blair in the break room and said, “Do you know where Jim is?”

“No, do you?” Blair teased.

“I’m serious. Carolyn is in the building and has made it crystal clear that she’s going to make a play for him today. So you might want to keep an eye on him,” Conner suggested.

“First of all, Jim isn’t interested, secondly, if I can’t trust him then we’ve got bigger problems then I think,” Blair explained.

“Well if you feel comfortable having him with someone that’s going to make a play for him, then so be it. I wouldn’t trust Carolyn as far as I could throw her,” Conner growled.

“Why do you dislike Carolyn?” Blair asked.

“I sat and listened to her rant this morning about how Jim belonged to her and she wasn’t giving him up without a fight. She makes me sick. She doesn’t want Jimbo at all, she just wants to win,” Conner stated angrily.

“You’re probably right, but I can’t go walking around behind him all day long either. I have to trust him and I do. He loves me,” Blair said very quietly.

“I know he does, but she might be able to still work her magic with him. What would you do then?” Conner asked.

“Then he isn’t worth having,” Blair replied sadly.

“OH you are so full of shit. You would be heartbroken if you two broke up,” Conner declared.

“Of course I would. But like I said before, I can’t follow him around all day long. I have to know that I can trust him. Besides, I have no idea where he is right now,” Blair said.

“He’s down in records, I heard him tell Rhonda, so go down there and be sure that everything is all right. Okay?” Conner made him promise.

“Okay, I promise,” Blair answered.

“I’ll see you later. If Simon comes looking for you two, I’ll tell him where you are,” Conner said. She walked off happily knowing that Blair was on top of things.

Blair walked down the stairs to Records and smiled the entire way. Conner was being so paranoid, but if it made her feel better, it’s the least Blair could do for her. She was a great friend and accepted them for who they were.

When he rounded the corner, he couldn’t believe his eyes. Jim was kissing Carolyn. Blair turned immediately and rushed back up the stairs and couldn’t seem to catch his breath right. He didn’t know what he was going to do now.

Conner saw the look on his face and knew she had been too late. She just wished there was something she could do to help, but there was nothing she could do in the middle of the bullpen.

Blair sat down at his desk and began to type up the next case file and tried to keep his mind off personal matters.

~~~~~

“Carolyn, what are you doing?” Jim said pulling away from his ex-wife’s lips.

“Jimmy, I just felt the need to feel your lips on mine. Wasn’t it great? It was just like it used to be. I still love you, Jimmy. I want us to get back together.”

“Carolyn, I’m with Blair. I’m not available. So get that through your head,” Jim demanded.

“Well there were four people in the room that saw you kissing me. So I would bet that Blair Sandburg won’t be a problem after today,” Caro said evilly.

“You are a bitch. A cold hearted bitch at that. You better not have ruined my life, or I’ll ruin yours even worse,” Jim warned.

“What are you going to do, Jimmy? Nothing you can do will scare me off,” Caro swore.

“I’m going to tell people that sex was so bad with you that I turned to men. I knew it had to be better then with you. That’s what I’ll do. I know you can’t stand the idea that people will know about me and Blair. Well, if this got out, it’s going to backfire into your face. You’re an evil person and I don’t know what I ever saw in you,” Jim said as he turned and walked away from her.

“No one will believe it, Jim. So you can threaten me all you want, but I’m not giving you up. Especially to Sandburg.”

“Fuck you, Carolyn.” Jim walked out of the room, madder then he had ever been in his life. He hoped that this didn’t get back to Blair already because Blair was already insecure about Caro. Jim rushed up the stairs hoping to see a smiling partner sitting at his desk. But when he opened the door, he knew Blair knew. Blair’s heart was pounding in his chest and Jim could smell the fear in the room.

Conner walked by and said, “I hope she makes you fucking happy, Jimbo.”

Jim grabbed her and whispered, “I didn’t have anything to do with it.”

“Were your lips on hers?” Conner asked.

“Yes, but I pulled away. Everyone must have seen the beginning and not the end. I pulled away from her and I told her off. I even threatened her,” Jim swore.

“Well, it’s not me you have to persuade, it’s Sandy.”

“I know and he knows already, I take it,” Jim asked.

“He saw you, Jimbo.” Conner walked away totally disgusted with Jim Ellison.

Jim said, “Of fuck,” to himself and walked over to his desk.

“Blair, I need to talk to you in private.”

“Not now. Not here. Not ever,” Blair said.

“It’s not what you thought. I’ve just been down stairs fighting with Carolyn about what did happen and it was ugly. Do you want to hear about it or not?” Jim said, getting angry that Blair wasn’t even willing to listen to him.

“No thank you, you prick,” Blair said as he got up to go and take the paperwork to Simon.

Jim sat at his desk and rubbed his hands across his face. What was he going to do now? Blair was madder then Jim had ever seen him and all because he didn’t move away from Carolyn soon enough. He must have thought they were kissing, kissing. He didn’t really blame Blair at all, if the tables were turned, he would be upset about Blair kissing someone else too.

Blair sat back down and didn’t bother to look in Jim’s direction. Jim knew he wasn’t going to talk to him that day at all. So Jim did the next best thing. He was going to write him an email. Jim didn’t usually do email during the day, in the bullpen, but today was a special circumstance.

Jim opened up the email server and began to type up an apology to Blair. He was using their personal accounts, and not the ones they used for work at all.

Subject: I’m so sorry, please read this.
Date: April 24th
From: JJEllison@hotmail.com
To: BJSandburg@hotmail.com


Dear Blair,

I know how angry and hurt you are, but you have to read this. Please read this. If you even love me a little bit, please do me a favor and read on.

When I went down to Records, Carolyn followed me in and we talked and suddenly she started crying. I didn’t know what to do. So I held my arms out to her and said, “Come here, honey.” And she came into my arms and I just held her. That’s all I planned on doing until she calmed down. But she had other plans. She pulled my face down and started to kiss me. It only lasted a second, Blair, I swear. I pulled away from her and we started to argue about how everyone would think I belonged to her now. She’s nuts. I think you already knew this, but I was hoping she would come around in the long run. I don’t want her to come around now. She was hoping that people would see us together and it would get back to you. She’s embarrassed that I’m with a man and she is bound and determined that she’s going to break us up. She said she wants us to get back together. I told her I wasn’t available, because I had hopes that we would still be together after this. Please think about it before you toss everything aside. I love you more then life itself and I would never do anything to hurt you on purpose. But she would. I don’t think she’s done yet. Please talk to me. I hate it when we fight. I’m going to leave you alone all afternoon until you decide what you’re going to do. I don’t want to push you in any way. But I’m hoping that you come around and see that I’m a good man, and I would never hurt you. You’re my life, Blair. Remember that. Let me know what you decide, either way.

I love you,

Jim

~~~~~

Jim sent the email off and waited, hoping that Blair would check his personal email while at work. Blair usually did, so he was hopeful.

Blair opened up the email program and saw an email from Jim. He looked over at the sad looking man and opened up the email to read.

As he read, he was getting angrier by the second. How dare Carolyn do this to the two of them? She was truly a bitch and for a change, Jim was seeing that in her. Blair looked at the clock and saw it was lunch time, so he walked by Jim’s desk and said, “I’ll meet you in the truck in ten minutes. We’re going to lunch to discuss this problem we seem to have.”

Jim got up and walked to the elevator, still not looking at Blair. Blair almost felt sorry for the man, but Blair knew that Jim was partly at fault and he was going to have to pay for this.

Jim waited in the truck and had his head on the steering wheel. When he heard the door open, he knew it was Blair. He still didn’t move from the steering wheel. Blair touched the back of his neck and said, “Drive to Bob’s Barbecue. I feel like barbecue today.”

Jim started the truck and still hadn’t looked at Blair. Blair was beginning to think that Jim thought they were over already. Blair didn’t want them to be over with, so he started talking.

“Jim, why did you let her kiss you?”

“She took me off guard. I was feeling sorry for her one minute and kissing her the next. I honestly can’t say anything more then that,” Jim explained as best as he could.

“Did you have old feelings for her? Is that why you let her kiss you and you kissed her back?” Blair asked almost afraid to hear the answer.

“Blair, I never ever kissed her back. She kissed me and I pulled away. If someone saw something it wasn’t what they thought. I would never betray you like that. I love you too much.”

“I saw you, Jim. It was me that saw you kissing her. It seemed like longer then her kissing you.”

Jim finally looked at Blair with tears in his eyes. “I swear, I didn’t kiss her back. She was trying to break us up and see its working. She knows exactly what she’s doing.”

“Did I say we were breaking up?” Blair asked.

Jim looked at Blair hopefully for the first time that day and said, “I would never betray you.”

“Then we’re not breaking up. In fact, pull over so I can kiss you. I need to get my taste on your mouth,” Blair ordered.

Jim did as he was told and pulled over to the side of the road and parked. Blair undid his seatbelt and sat right by Jim. “Kiss me, man and make me believe that there is no one else in your life but me.”

Jim did just that. When the kiss had ended, Blair was hot and horny. “Okay, I totally believe you. You are the best fucking kisser I have ever been with. You’re lips should be illegal.”

Jim smiled and said, “So am I forgiven?”

“Yes.”

“Can I be angry about you believing that I would betray you like that?” Jim asked.

“Yes, you can be, but we’re not going to be mean to each other about anything. I love you, Jim. The thought of losing you was too hard to bear. And I really thought you were kissing her.”

“I’m sorry that you had to think that. I’ll never let her get in my space again. She can’t be trusted, that’s for sure,” Jim said seriously.

“Let’s stop and get lunch and then go back to work, so no one is worried about us. They’ll see we’re fine and Carolyn will lose the battle. Does that work for you?” Blair asked.

“It’s perfect for me. I love you.”

“I love you, Jim.”

Things weren’t always going to be perfect, but the two of them could sure try.

The end

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